Introduction of My Life: Einführung von meinem Leben

Ludwig van Beethoven in 1820, by Joseph Karl Stieler

Portrait courtesy of Wikipedia

Spirit of Ludwig van Beethoven speaking:

My name is Ludwig van Beethoven, and I am one of the greatest Classical composers ever to have lived. Throughout my life, I have faced harships and I have grieved. I have also had some of the happiest moments ever experienced, for music itself gives me joy. Thus, I have never regretted anything in my life. Nothing, except for dying before I had the chance to complete some of the compositions still swimming in my head. However, who am I to say that I had died before my time? God was calling me to Heaven, and I could not resist His call.

During my lifetime, I've been called genius and prodigy. I have accomplished many of the things I have wanted to accomplish in life, such as making monarchs bow down to me, falling in love, writing the greatest masterpiece of all time, and listening to some of the most beautiful pieces of music (before I became deaf.) Yet, despite all this happiness, I was not a very happy man. I lost my second most prized posession, my hearing, in my twenties. So grateful was I to God that I had not lost my fingers instead! Although I could not hear the wonderful music I created, I could still write and commit to paper the waves of sound I heard in my head. This was the only consolation I had when facing myself in the mirror and wondering whether a soundless life was truly worth living.

I have loved many women, most of whom were my students, although there was one woman in particular that I truly loved. I call her my "Immortal Beloved" and only I shall know her true identity. The rest of my readers shall have to guess at wonder at her name.

Despite the number of women I loved in my life, I loved music more. Music was the entirety of my life. There was not a single moment in my life where music had not been involved. My every thought was consumed by my love that is music. I was a composer, a pianist, and a revelation in the music world of the 18th and 19th centuries, and I will continue to be that revelation in the future world to come and even in the New World (aka America).

Throughout this blog, I shall talk about important events in my life, and famous compositions that I have composed and performed. I hope my readers have a great time exploring and devouring the history that I have written, for it is the history of the greatest Classical music composer in the 19th century! Of course, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, my former mentor, has his place as one of the greatest Classical composers in the 18th century, and there will no doubt be other just-as-great composers in the future. But for now, we shall be focusing on me, the Great Beethoven!

Sincerely,

Beethoven composing in apartment in Vienna

Picture courtesy of Google Images

Early Sonatas

Here are some of my early sonatas, both of which I dedicated to my teacher, Joseph Haydn.

SONATE

Joseph Haydn gewidmet

Komponiert 1795

f-minor, Op. 2, No.1: Allegro

SONATE

Joseph Haydn gewidmet

Komponiert 1795

A Major, Op. 2, No. 2: Allegro vivace

Beginning Years: 1770-1790

13 year old Beethoven in 1783

Portrait courtesy of timelines.com

22 August, 1793

I have finally begun my art of posting. I shall begin by telling of my first few years of life. I myself do not know the exact day of my birth, although it is assumed that I was born on December 16^th because I was baptized on the 17^th of December in 1770. I was born in the city of Bonn in Germany, which was the capital of the Electorate of Cologne and a part of the Holy Roman Empire of the German Nation. I have been studying music and playing the organ and piano since I was very young and with my genius, I was definitely one of the most gifted musicians in Europe at the time. Of course, I was also one of the most humble pianists and although others say otherwise, I know I am not as arrogant as they say I am.

I gave my first public performance at the age of seven, but my father announced to the audience that I was only six years old. Ever since then, I’ve always been a bit confused about how old I really am. I wrote and published my first composition for piano at the age of 11, and naturally, my very impressed professor, Neefe, wrote (referring to me) that "if he continues like this he will be, without doubt, the new Mozart." What high praise! Not that I didn’t deserve it.

Beethoven's house of birth in Bonn, Germany

My father taught me everything I knew about music up to this point, but I knew I was destined for a greater future which included great and famous teachers and royalty who would beg to hear my performances. Some of my other teachers include Professor Neefe, and even the great Mozart himself! Of course, only I was worthy enough to be his student since I am without a doubt the best of the best in all of Europe.

My family included a mother, a father, and three sons of whom I was the eldest. My mother is the most kindest woman in the world and she’s my best friend. But my father is a lousy old drunk who was a musician at the Court of Bonn until he lost his position due to his inability to stay sober in order to keep his role at the court. I had six other brothers at a time, but unfortunately, only two of them survived the dreadful childhood. Me with my genius and God-given talent couldn’t have possibly died like my other brothers! I would never have died before showing the world the extent of my skills and abilities and have even kings bow down to me.

Just like I predicted in my earlier years, a monarch named Prince Maximilian Franz recognized my genius and sent me to Vienna, the most cultural and musical of all cities, in order to meet god-like Mozart! Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart himself became my teacher in 1787. Throughout my studies the great composer and musician, Mozart gave me an all-mighty praise! "Don’t forget his name — you will hear it spoken often!" is what he said! I will never forget those words for as long as I live.

However, this great time in my life was shadowed by the death of my dearest mother. The only person who I truly loved and cared about in my family passed away on July 17^th, 1787. In the end, the call of Vienna to me was too strong, and I returned to the city of wonders after five long years, in 1792, from a grant by Prince Elector who paid for my trip so I could once again pursue my musical education through the teachings of Haydn who was Mozart’s teacher! After traveling to Vienna, I no longer had any wish to return to my home town which held so many painful memories such as beatings from my dad and the death of my mother.

This is where I end my first log. I’ve covered my life up to my early twenties. Don’t worry, I am not planning to die any time soon for too few people in the world still don’t know about my genius.


Sincerely,



Pathetique Sonata and Symphony No. 1

SONATE

GRANDE SONATE PATHETIQUE

Dem Fursten Carl von Lichnowsky gewidmet

Komponiert 1798-1799

c minor, Op. 13, No. 8: Grave

The Pathetique Sonata marked the beginning of a very difficult and crucial time in my life. I had just begun to lost my hearing in the year of 1796, and as my hearing continued to deteriorate throughout the next few years, I began to feel depression, anger, and even thoughts of suicide entered my head.

As you will later hear, the first movement (Exposition) of my Pathetique begins with dissonant chords, which represent the turmoil I was experiencing in my life. The second movement (Development) is soft and serious, as I was testing my hearing abilities and trying to come to terms with my deafness. Like all of my other third movements (Recapitulation), it is fast and lively, to remind myself that no matter how bad a situation seems, things will always get worse. Therefore, I should live my life the way I want to live it and listen to as much music as I can before my ears fail me.

Exposition:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ms4wtCcslO0&feature=related

Development:

Recapitulation:



SINFONIE

baron Gottfried van Swieten gewidmet

Komponiert 1799-1800

C-Major, Op. 21, No. 1

I premiered my first symphony at the Imperial Theatre of Vienna on April 2, 1800. This symphony caused my name to be known to even more individuals in Europe, although it is definitely not one of my favorite symphonies.

1st Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c2qr3iYFIi4

2nd Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlMX790X0wE&feature=related

3rd Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=si_5Fb47uV8&feature=related

4th Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=keAphDGM4do&feature=related

Early Period: 1790 - 1800

Ludwig van Beethoven in 1801 by Carl Traugott Riedel

Portrait courtesy of timelines.com

11 April, 1803

I have once again resumed my art of reporting my life's history. Some events in these past ten years have been my worst memories. Yet, I have still managed to keep living a relatively content life.

I begin my story in the year of 1792. It was during the fall season that I left my hometown of Bonn, just as the armies of the French Revolution was storming the provinces of Rhineland. (Like others from Bonn, I am partial to the French Revolution. I was attracted to the ideas of the Enlightenment, which had previously been thought of has impossible utopian ideals, although seeing the French Revolution in action made me think otherwise.) Bonn would later submit to the hands of the French, and I would never return to my hometown. However, before I left Bonn, I created a very famous profile for myself and came to be known to almost every citizen in north-western Germany! So famous was I that people had begun to say that my talent as an improviser was even greater than that of Mozart! Imagine that: greater than Mozart himself!

It is no wonder that my reputation preceded me and as soon as I moved to Vienna after leaving Bonn that many aristocrats of Vienna scrambled to get their jewel-encrusted claws on me. Some of my earlier patrons included Gottfried, Baron von Swieten and Karl, Furst von Lichnowsky, all of whom were supporters of my former teacher and most admired composer and pianist, Mozart. Thus, I added a van- to my last name, creating a new name for myself: Ludwig van Beethoven as well as giving myself a presumed aristocratic title as many aristocrats of my time had van- or von- in their last name.

It must have been willed by God that by the time I traveled to Vienna, the city itself was called the City of Music. Music was appreciated everywhere in this city, and there were hardly any nobles who did not play music themselves or hire musicians (such as myself) to play for them. Prince Lichnowsky himself offered me free board and lodgings to which I graciously accepted. I've said it before and I"ll say it again, but nobles have and will always bow down to me and not I to them! In the year of 1795, I gave my first public performance in Vienna where I played my Concerto Opus 19, No. 2 and a concerto composed by Mozart.

Later, I composed and published the Three Trios for Piano, Violin, and Cello, Opus 1. This composition was subscribed to by many nobles, which just shows how sought for I was in Vienna. Nothing less expected from my genius! Throughout the next three years, I traveled to Berlin and Prague to give concerts during my tours. On April 2, 1800, I performed my First Symphony and my Septet Opus 20 in a grand-scale public concert, thus causing my fame to spread even more.

Despite the music I composed and the fame I earned, this period was not an entirely happy one. In the year of 1796, I began to notice a slight buzzing or ringing in my ears. It was slightly unpleasant, but I was still able to play, compose, and hear music and therefore it did not bother me. Only years later would I understand the severity of my condition. Only years later would I not be able to hear the joys of music again.

I shall continue my story at a later date, for the constant ringing in my ears is annoying the hell out of me.

Sincerely,

Symphony No. 3 and No. 5

SINFONIE

Sinfonia eroica, composta per festeggiare il sovvenire d'un grand'uomo

("heroic symphony, composed to celebrate the memory of a great man")

Originally named Eroica Symphony

Prince Franz Joseph von Lobkowitz gewidmet

Originally dedicated to Napolean Bonparte

E-flat Major, Op. 55, No. 3

Komponiert 1804

My Eroica symphony had originally been dedicated to Napolean Bonparte, a man who I had admired very much. However, as you can see in this original manuscript (shown above), after Napolean declared himself emperor of France, I was so angry at myself that I had actually looked up to this man that I grabbed a knife and scratched out his name. This symphony was first performed on April 7, 1805 at the Theater-an-der-Wien in Vienna.

1st Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHvztnHOWEQ&feature=related

2nd Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54WhugYCFag&feature=fvw

3rd Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1yn9IgOBjkU&feature=related

4th Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2gmx1FzfEA&feature=fvw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt4jtYpTHWM&feature=related

SINFONIE

c-minor, Op. 67, No. 5

Komponiert 1807-1808

Prince Lobkowitz and Count Andreas Rzumovsky gewidmet

This symphony was first performed on December 22, 1808 at the Theater-an-der-Wien in Vienna.

1st Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_4IRMYuE1hI

2nd Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQIVWhKhwPA

3rd Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mvbRe5JOWk

4th Movement:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DAyUzxDB9eE

Middle/Heroic Period: 1800-1810

Ludwig van Beethoven, 1803, by Christian Hornemann

Portrait courtesy of timelines.com

12 December, 1810

Alas! Lament with me, my dear friends, for the great Beethoven is deaf! I have lost my entire sense of hearing . . . how, as a musician am I to go on living life? Fate has been cruel to me. Likewise, I shall be cruel to Fate itself! "I shall seize Fate by the throat; it shall certainly not bend and crush me completely!" I will live on. I will continue my life. I will live my life just as if I had not become deaf. I will be the world's greatest deaf composer.

I had first begun to notice something wrong with my ears as early as the year 1795. I could barely hear the harshest of noises, and the buzz in my ear was constant. Soft and low tones became unintelligible, and loud sounds became distorted. By 1801, I became completely deaf. In a few letters I wrote to my closest confidant, Karl Ameda, "How often I wish you were here, for your Beethoven is having a miserable life, at odds with nature and its Creator, abusing the latter for leaving his creatures vulnerable to the slightest accident ... My greatest faculty, my hearing, is greatly deteriorated." Ameda was most sympathetic towards me and my plight. But spilling out my most horrifying secret to one friend was not enough. I also wrote to Wegeler, saying "How can I, a musician, say to people "I am deaf!" I shall, if I can, defy this fate, even though there will be times when I shall be the unhappiest of God's creatures ... I live only in music ... frequently working on three or four pieces simultaneously." Whilst writing these letters, I comtemplated suicide . . . I thought about erasing the remnants of my life for being not able to hear was almost too much for me to bear. But I threw that thought away as soon as I had conjured it. For how could the world bear to lose their great Beethoven just because of something as simple as deafness? What horrors would the world face without my music? How could the world bear to go on without me? Thus, I decided to remain a living, and deaf, composer.

Perhaps God himself has sent me this deafness to challenge me. To see if I am worthy of being His musician. Well I am ready for this challenge. I will face it head on, and I will conquer it. My life has become a challenge worth fighting for, as I have written to Wegeler: "Free me of only half this affliction and I shall be a complete, mature man. You must think of me as being as happy as it is possible to be on this earth - not unhappy. No! I cannot endure it. I will seize Fate by the throat. It will not wholly conquer me! Oh, how beautiful it is to live - and live a thousand times over!"

Unable to keep all this grief and anger bottled up inside me, I penned out my feelings in my Heiligenstadt Testament on October 6, 1802. Here, I wrote "If at times I tried to forget all this, oh how harshly I was flung back by the doubly sad experience of my bad hearing. Yet it was impossible for me to say to people, "Speak louder, shout, for I m deaf." Ah, how could I possibly admit an infirmity in the one sense which ought to be more perfect in me than others, a sense which I once possessed in the highest perfection, a perfection such as few in my profession enjoy or ever have enjoyed --- Oh i cannot do it."

Although I wrote several pages of this Heiligenstadt Testament, I hid it and did not show a single soul what I had written. Only after my death, along with my will, will this paper be shown to and read by the world.

The Heiligenstadt Testament

Picture courtesy of timelines.com

Last page of Heiligenstadt Testament

Picture courtesy of lvbeethoven.com

Despite my illness, I continued to compose throughout my life until my death. One composition that I will never forget, is my Symphony No. 3, more commonly known as the Eroica Symphony. I had written this piece with Napolean as it's dedication in mind. Oh how excited I was to hear of Napolean's great accomplishments! I had thought he was a God-send, ready to revolutionize the whole of Europe! I had admired him to the point of worshipping him, only then did he disappoint me the most. After Napolean crowned himself emperor on December 2, 1804, I was so furious, my head so clouded with rage that I grabbed the nearest blade I could find and plunged it into my own manuscript: Sinfonie in E-Flat Major. Crossing out Napolean's name, I renamed my piece: composta per festiggiare il Souvenire di un grand'Uomo (composed to celebrate the memory of a great man.)

Oh but Napolean did not cease to disappoint me. As I finished working on my first opera, and also my last, the Leonore, (although my idiotic publishers renamed it Fidelio), Napolean stormed and took over Vienna. My beloved city of music! Thus, when my opera first played in Vienna, it's only audience were Napolean's French soldiers! Oh how angry I was! But nevertheless, my life continued and I forgot about Bonparte for a time.

In 1809, I would become the first independent composer ever! I had wanted to leave Vienna, although my patrons loved me too much to let me go, and were adamant upon my stay in the city. My old friend, Countess Anna Marie Erdody, Archbishop Rudolph, Prince Lobkowitz, and Prince Kinsky gave me a grant of 4,000 florins, so badly did they want me to stay! They must have loved my music very much. As I've said before, I've always known that nobles will bow before me.

I shall continue my life's story at a later date, for I am in the middle of composing my next symphony. Goodnight, my readers, although should you say goodnight to me back, I will not be able to hear it.

Sincerely,

Battle Symphony and Fur Elise

SINFONIE

Wellington's Victory

Battle of Vitoria

The Battle Symphony

Opus 91

Prince Regent gewidmet

Komponiert 1813

Battle of Vitoria

Picture courtesy of britishbattles.com

Although this is a common misconception, this song was written to commemorate Wellington's victory over Joseph Bonparte in the Battle of Vitoria in Spain on June 21, 1813, not Wellington's defeat of Napolean Bonparte in the Battle of Waterloo. I hate it when people get mixed up about my songs.  




1st Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TUZNAZ3LHnw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTU-7TtPLi0&feature=related

Fur Elise

a-minor, Bagatelle No. 25

Therese Malfatti von Rohrenbach zu Dezza gewidmet

Komponiert April 27, 1810

Therese Malfatti

Picture courtesy of Google Images

Like I've said before, I hate it when people get mixed up about my songs. This piece's actual title is Fur Therese, referring to Therese Malfatti, who I had once wanted to marry and who I had dedicated this piece to. She was my student and close confidant. I'd proposed to her in the year 1810 with this song in my head, however, she turned me down and married another. Therefore, I did not publish this piece during my lifetime.

End Period: 1810-1820

Ludwig van Beethoven in 1804, by Willibrord Joseph Mahler 

Portrait courtesy of Wikipedia

27 January, 1821

This past decade has been filled with love and sadness. Although I have loved, I have also lost. In the year of 1812, at the recommendation of my doctor, I traveled to Teplitz for hydrotherapy and to rest and recuperate. It was then that I wrote my letters to my beloved immortal. I shall not mention her name here, although in my mind, she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Her mere face sends compositions rushing through my head, and the sound of her voice is like the music I aim to compose. I've written many letters to her, many of which I've burned, many of which I've kept in secret, and none of which I have sent. One of my hidden letters contain my words: "My angel, my all, my very self - a few words only today, and in pencil. Why such profound sorrow when necessity speaks? Can our love endure but through sacrifice - but through not demanding all - canst thou alter it that thou art not wholly mine, and I not wholly thine?" Yet, my beloved immortal would never read this letter, for I would never send it.

Mystery woman whose portrait was found inside Beethoven's secret drawer

Immortal Beloved?

Picture courtesy of lvbeethoven.com

Besides issues with my love life, Teplitz was also a place where I became notorious. Also in the year of 1812, my friend Goethe and I were walking around in a park behind the puny castle of Teplitz. It was there that Goethe spotted the Empress of Austria and her retinue walking just as we had been. Rushing over there like an idiot, he gave a deep bow to the Empress, and insisted I did the same. As if! I, the great Beethoven, bow to an Empress? Heavens, of course not! I was born so kings and queens could bow down to me! And not I to them! Of course, I intentionally strode right past her with my hat firmly placed upon my head and my arms tightly crossed over my chest. My friend Goethe was horrified, and he broke off our friendship at that incident. Who cares? I don't need any friends. There are hundreds of over people begging to be friends with me, and tens of other nobles waiting in line to bow down to me.

The Incident of Teplitz by Carl Rohling

Picture courtesy of madaboutbeethoven.com

Besides the few occurings in 1812, there were also a few accomplishments I made in the year of 1814. When the Congress of Vienna met, all the heads of state gathered together to determine the fate of Europe after Napoleon's dictatorship. Thus, I was invited to play at their court many times, earning the fame and admiration of many political leaders of my time. I was a happy and proud man then.

In 1815, a series of unfortunate events occurred. First, my brother, Kaspar Karl died on November 15th. As if that wasn't bad enough, he wrote in his will that I and his widow would be joint-guardians of his then 9-year old son, Karl. This began my long and tiring battle for full custody of my nephew, since I believed his mother to be a fickle and irresponsible woman unfit to care for my brother's son. I despised that ugly and immoral Johanna! I was serious in raising the boy right, and I was most certain she did not possess the same attitude I did when regarding the boy's future. It was during this period of time that I stopped composing for a short while. During my hiatus, I frequently fell ill due to the strain I was put under while fighting for sole guardianship of my nephew. Only five years later would I finally win my lawsuit to become Karl's sole guardian.

I must attend to my nephew now, for it would be irresponsible of me to spend so much of my time fighting for custody of the boy and not spend my time caring for him to make sure his future is a successful one. Goodnight.

Sincerely,

Favorite Sonatas and Symphony No. 9

SONATE
Tempest Sonata

d-minor, Op. 31, No. 2

Countess Anne Margarete von Browne gewidmet

Komponiert 1802

1st Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3N58G9DRaA

2nd Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UeT5etiaJOI&feature=related

3rd Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyGPclYqk7I&feature=related

SONATE
Appassionata Sonata

Count Franz Brunswick gewidmet

f-minor, Op. 57, No. 23

Komponiert 1804 - 1805

1st Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xlcVu8SLDdo&feature=channel

2nd Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gdUWdDVriI&feature=channel

3rd Movement:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4o3eiEHmJUA&feature=channel



SINFONIE

Frederich Wilhelm III of Prussia gewidmet

d-minor, Op. 125, No. 9

Komponiert 1822-1824

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAOTCtW9v0M



Last Years: 1820-1827

Ludwig van Beethoven in 1815, by Willibrord Joseph Mahler

Portrait courtesy of timelines.com



4, December 1827

Nothing much has happened in these past few years. I finished my ninth symphony in 1823. Also, in that same year, I met a sharp and bright young lad, who I feel will have the makings of a great musician later on. Franz Liszt, a young Hungarian lad, was only 11 years old when I came to his concert to see him perform on April 13th. Oh what a great player the boy was! If only my nephew, Karl, had the same talent his boy possessed.

Unfortunately, my  nephew is somewhat of a dunce . . . no, scratch that. My nephew is a complete idiot when it comes to the appreciation of the finer qualities of music! He could not tell a C note from an A, while I his uncle, who shares his blood, who is the greatest composer on Earth, who cannot hear, can tell the difference between all the notes on the piano! Oh, I should not work myself up, for the doctor has told me to keep my blood pressure down, else it will imped my other illnessses that have plagued my life.

Anyways, after Liszt's performance, I went over to the boy and congratulated him heartily, so impressed was I by him. Perhaps he will be my successor in this musical world, a boy worthy of receiving my blessing, will undoubtedly heap loads of musical talent on this world long after I am gone.

On the 7th of May in 1824, my ninth symphony was first performed at the Karntnertor Theatre. I insisted on conducting at this symphony, for I knew my years on this world were almost over, and I would probably not live to see the next decade. Of course, I was conducting completely off beat due to my deafness, and I did not know that the real conductor was sitting a little off to the side and the players were actually looking to him when looking for conducting instructions. Only months later when one of my audience members had told me about that other conductor had I known.

This "other conductor" business was not the only thing I had not known. When my ninth symphony's performance was over, I could not hear the applause. Heck, I didn't even know that my own piece was over! In fact, until ony of my soloists turned me around to face the audience to see the thunderous applause and standing ovation they gave to my composition that I wept.

However, this happiness wasn't to last. In the year of 1826, my nephew attempted suicide! WHAT AN IDIOT MY NEPHEW IS. If he had truly wanted to commit suicide, he might as well do it properly! Remember, I said "attempted suicide!" My nephew attemped, and he failed! Oh, how am I related by blood to this young idiot? Apparently, he had two pistols and a heap of gunpowder at his disposal. Yet, he failed to shoot himself in the head? HOW? I know he is not a very bright young lad, but he does have an awfully huge and empty head! I have no idea how he managed to MISS shooting himself in the head. Anyways, he missed both times he tried to shoot himself. The second bullet grazed his temple but that was it. I really do sometimes wonder whether this boy was switched at the hospital, for I myself am quite an intelligent man. Therefore, there must be no way that this genius (me) is related to this suicide-committing-idiot (Karl).

After Karl's failed attempted suicide, my other younger brother, Johann (not Karl's father who had already passed away) invited the both of us to visit him at his house in Gneixendorf to get away from the atmosphere in Vienna. At first, I declined. But Johann persistently repeated his invitation, and nagged through his letters he sent weekly. After my nephew recovered from his attempted suicide in the hospital, I accepted my brother's invitation, and when I arrived there, my brother gave me my own servant! This brother certainly knows how to treat me! Or at least that's what I thought at the time. How wrong I was! Throughout my stay at Johann's apartment, Johann continued to pick fights with me. He questioned my stay at his apartment with issues over whether I should pay rent. Johann had invited ME to stay with HIM. I would certainly not prefer to be here if he himself had not asked me! And now he's asking me to pay rent to stay in a place I didn't like? Of course I refused! Besides, that, Johann frequently argued with me over Karl's inheritance. Although I do think the boy is an idiot, I still love him! He is my nephew after all! I am a relatively rich composer, although I do not spend my money like a rich composer because I am always putting some money aside for Karl. And Johann questions my noble act of doing this! How rude of him!

Beethoven's room in Gneixendorf

Photo courtesy of madaboutbeethoven.com

Alternate view of Beethoven's room in Gneixendorf

Photo courtesy of madaboutbeethoven.com

All this stress from arguing with my idiotic brother added to my weak health. In these past few years, my stomach and ankles began to swell, and I had to wear a belt around my stomach to hold it in. I finished my Late Quartet Op. 130 in my stay at Gneixendorf.

It was only a few days ago that my brother and I had a horrible and terrible row where I demanded to leave the hell that is Gneixendorf with Karl, despite the fact that the open milk cart was the only transportation available. Nevertheless, my pride exceeded me, and Karl and I left that very day for Vienna which took two days to complete. I am now a very sick man, for traveling for two days in the biting frost of December was too much for me to bear.

I shall leave my entry here. For I need to soak in a hot bath to ease the terrible aching of my bones.

Sincerely,