Ludwig van Beethoven in 1804, by Willibrord Joseph Mahler
Portrait courtesy of Wikipedia
27 January, 1821
This past decade has been filled with love and sadness. Although I have loved, I have also lost. In the year of 1812, at the recommendation of my doctor, I traveled to Teplitz for hydrotherapy and to rest and recuperate. It was then that I wrote my letters to my beloved immortal. I shall not mention her name here, although in my mind, she is the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. Her mere face sends compositions rushing through my head, and the sound of her voice is like the music I aim to compose. I've written many letters to her, many of which I've burned, many of which I've kept in secret, and none of which I have sent. One of my hidden letters contain my words: "My angel, my all, my very self - a few words only today, and in pencil. Why such profound sorrow when necessity speaks? Can our love endure but through sacrifice - but through not demanding all - canst thou alter it that thou art not wholly mine, and I not wholly thine?" Yet, my beloved immortal would never read this letter, for I would never send it.
Mystery woman whose portrait was found inside Beethoven's secret drawer
Immortal Beloved?
Picture courtesy of lvbeethoven.com
Besides issues with my love life, Teplitz was also a place where I became notorious. Also in the year of 1812, my friend Goethe and I were walking around in a park behind the puny castle of Teplitz. It was there that Goethe spotted the Empress of Austria and her retinue walking just as we had been. Rushing over there like an idiot, he gave a deep bow to the Empress, and insisted I did the same. As if! I, the great Beethoven, bow to an Empress? Heavens, of course not! I was born so kings and queens could bow down to me! And not I to them! Of course, I intentionally strode right past her with my hat firmly placed upon my head and my arms tightly crossed over my chest. My friend Goethe was horrified, and he broke off our friendship at that incident. Who cares? I don't need any friends. There are hundreds of over people begging to be friends with me, and tens of other nobles waiting in line to bow down to me.
The Incident of Teplitz by Carl Rohling
Picture courtesy of madaboutbeethoven.com
Besides the few occurings in 1812, there were also a few accomplishments I made in the year of 1814. When the Congress of Vienna met, all the heads of state gathered together to determine the fate of Europe after Napoleon's dictatorship. Thus, I was invited to play at their court many times, earning the fame and admiration of many political leaders of my time. I was a happy and proud man then.
In 1815, a series of unfortunate events occurred. First, my brother, Kaspar Karl died on November 15th. As if that wasn't bad enough, he wrote in his will that I and his widow would be joint-guardians of his then 9-year old son, Karl. This began my long and tiring battle for full custody of my nephew, since I believed his mother to be a fickle and irresponsible woman unfit to care for my brother's son. I despised that ugly and immoral Johanna! I was serious in raising the boy right, and I was most certain she did not possess the same attitude I did when regarding the boy's future. It was during this period of time that I stopped composing for a short while. During my hiatus, I frequently fell ill due to the strain I was put under while fighting for sole guardianship of my nephew. Only five years later would I finally win my lawsuit to become Karl's sole guardian.
I must attend to my nephew now, for it would be irresponsible of me to spend so much of my time fighting for custody of the boy and not spend my time caring for him to make sure his future is a successful one. Goodnight.
Sincerely,
